I am not a hoarder. I am a tosser. That is, I do not form emotional attachments to objects. I have items that are sentimental to me, and I have some beautiful items. But, if I had to go without them, I would be happy with a photo of it. Before I got my housekeeping skills "under control" I had been known to run through a room with a paper bag, and put everything that was out of place in it. I'd staple it shut, and date it. If I didn't open the bag in 6 months, I would throw it away, unopened. In the dozens of times I did that, I only missed 2 things, and at this point I can only remember what one of those was. I am a tosser.
The joke is that people watch the show Hoarders: Buried Alive so they can feel good about their own housekeeping. I just watched an episode, and I don't feel better. I don't really understand this illness, but I can understand wanting to collect things. This woman, like most of the hoarding shows, didn't just collect things. She kept everything.
What I CAN'T understand is why a hoarder keeps everything, including garbage. Not just broken things, but honest to Pete garbage. Uneaten food, dog poop, empty sacks, cans, bottles, taco bell wrappers. I don't get it. What is is about this illness that causes these people to live in filth? No working kitchen, no working bath, no bed to sleep in. Just layers of filth, and trash, and things. I understand keeping things, but how about putting them in boxes, and throwing away the trash? The whole thing made me want to cry.
Hoarding is a coping mechanism. Most people who hoard are filling all the empty places, all the empty holes in their lives. Dare I say, their souls? Oh, I know, there are Born Again Bible Thumpers who hoard, I know a couple of them personally. They, like many others with this condition have suffered unimaginable loss in their lives. I don't blame them, I don't judge them. But, I don't want them to live like that either.
But why? Why did this make me want to cry? Even though I am a tosser, I am always on the precipice of similar behavior. This week, for example, I spent my time collecting, of all things, digital representations of paper dolls. There is a purpose for this, and I have already started to implement it. I am making a smash journal, and have used some there. I am also collecting public domain paper dolls, along with other public domain items to use in digital scrap kits. I love the chase. I love finding the perfect item. I have almost 3 terabytes of perfect items. No, I don't hoard.
Now, we are back to being sad about this show. Yes, it highlighted some areas that I personally need to work on. But I really feel bad for these people living like this. Uh Oh. What is wrong with me? I want to help these people escape the hell they have made for themselves in their dreary homes, to live in cleanliness and light. I forgot it's temporary. Shouldn't I really be trying to help them escape the real hell, and live in light for eternity? Now, that really makes me sad.